Michael J. Fox in his book, Always Looking Up, said it best. “I’ve come to understand that no parent can get his or her arms around all of the could’ves, would’ves, should’ves, mights, maybes and what-ifs. Each new experience is just that — new and untested. It comes with an altogether different load than the load you are already carrying. Our arms, especially our parents grow shakier in some instances under all the weight.” For that reason, grace, humility and forgiveness are the cornerstones of any relationship. They are also gifts we must give ourselves at times throughout our lives.
In life, there is a lot of trial and error in decision making. Mistakes are inevitable. Replaying negative and painful events from the past, whether because of your own doing or others, only serves to re-traumatize you. This is how even more mistakes and misfortunes are created – under the debilitating weight of the past. Under this weight, one’s reality becomes tainted. This is your doing and no one else’s. That is because the containment of any thought program is our choice point. The past cannot hurt you but you can harm yourself by staying stuck replaying anything. Use life’s lessons to propel you forward – to help you grow and become victorious, even stronger. Why not create as much distance as you can from your past in order to distinguish yourself. Let that be your legacy.
Blaming a person or event from your past is you believing you do not have the power to control the way you feel and think or the outcome of your life. This is your mind working against you and not for you.
Recognizing that you are created as a spiritual being and that your identity doesn’t come from your past or even those who raised you, but rather comes from your Creator, will set you free. That is because we are each born with a Christ-like identity. One that craves meaning and purpose. Without God in the backdrop of our lives, there is very little meaning and no way to truly forgive or extend grace to ourselves or others. We must first realize that we need to make our life right by getting right with God – getting back in communion with Him. We do this by asking Him into our lives, to forgive us and extend us grace. Only then can you give it away. The Holy Spirit is hour holy helper. This is where divine assistance comes into play. But you must ask for it. You must raise your hand and declare that you want to heal yourself and your relationships. It won’t magically happen. That is because prayer alone won’t cut it. It takes your participation. The reason so many people are lost and free falling through life, grabbing onto the things of this world to self-soothe, is because they’ve lost the connection to their Creator. If you deny yourself that relationship and become untethered to your Creator, you are in essence, stepping out of the seat of your soul and abdicating your sovereignty.
It is not easy to try to erase the past, nor wipe away the lost years that have accrued under the weight of the guilt and shame, but it can be done. It’s easier than you think. Forgiveness is the starting point.
Are you ready to forgive yourself for the containment of the stories, experiences and the negative thought programs that were born out of holding onto false narratives?
Ready to forgive yourself for all the lost years?
Ready to forgive yourself for all the parenting mistakes?
Ready to forgive yourself for the missed opportunities brought on many years of overthinking, worry, and indecision?
Ready to forgive yourself for self-rejecting?
How do you forgive yourself? By first being forgiven. Christ died on the cross for our sins. For an entire day He hung, suffocating to death so that we could be eternally saved from sin. He did this because He knew we need a Savior – someone to save us from ourselves. If Jesus can forgive you, you must forgive yourself. No sin is too big for Him to wash away.
If you are not a Christian and want to become one, simply pray this prayer. “Dear God, I know I have sinned. I am filled with regret and remorse for what I’ve done to myself and others. I ask for You to come into my heart and take away my guilt and restore my joy. I cannot do this on my own. Please come into my heart as my personal Savior and forgive me of my sins. Clear a path to those who can help me in my journey of healing and restoration. Thank You. Amen”
You must cloak yourself with the covering of Christ in order to stand down temptation, spiritual warfare, pity parties and the blame game. You can do this by bathing yourself in the Word of God. A study Bible like The Jeremiah Study Bible will be a tremendous resource. Click on the resource tab on the Home Page for more ways to stay bathed in the Word of God. Reading the Word daily, praying regularly and surrounding yourself with like-minded believers is seminal to your spiritual growth.
The moment you have unkind thoughts or feelings toward others or yourself, surrender them to the Lord. With the Holy Spirit inside of you, you are more than a conqueror.
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” I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” Galatians 2:20
